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I Hate Writing Poems
Each time the ink
slides down and bonds itself
to the pressed tree I wither
Agony is in my sweet prose
These words stolen
from the cold lips of royalty long ago
Not meant for me
but in desperate resolution
I lace these satin pages with black blood
for each word is
a scar searing pain
anguish and shame
have lain me to waste this paper
disgrace my language raped
thrusting this pen
deeper into incrimination
for I cannot stop the words
from clawing out of my mind
I tried to but this
wound is too deep
the ink flows
Drowning
confluence of doubts
rising tide of unease
insecurities unite
this cloud of ash and
sadness rain down upon me
acid reality prickles against
exposed nerves
it is all merging together
as it falls apart
in hope lost reverie
I say it is the last
embrace before chaos
this is sadness
misery is but my shadow
and on these crying thoughts
I hang my doubts in threes
such order
chaos reigns
Off Key...
These soft off white pages
When my hands them split apart
For I saw into a keyhole
I
witnessed
Your clandestine thoughts
Someone has been here
Your sand has footprints across it
My beach untouched
before
Your dark steps navigated
Thee scribbled off black words
When my eyes into them searched
For meaning
in this keyhole
I worried
Your true nature
Something unseen here
Your mind has shadows in it
My soul is
strong before
Your dark hands touched
These subtle off translucent meanings
When my mind from them wondered
For
making a key
I willed
Got To Thinking......
I got to thinking
swept away
Where are
we going
disoriented
I don't know you
strangers
But we bonded
attraction
I find paper scraps
clues
I
gave too much
possibly probably
I gave too quickly
rushing
But my hopes are high
eagerness
I
wrapped myself into you
closeness
I still do
present time
I don't know what I want
confusion
But
I've got to thinking
My Catalyst...
you ignite me
like a spark of flint
your attention
your affection
you
excite me
like a shiver down my spine
your understanding
your intellect
you catalyze me
like my soul in
blissful burning
your desire
your attire
you turned the key and baby, I started up
I purr like a kitten
as
you pump the gas
I never knew I could move this fast
as we race together
as one blur of
untamed joy
I feel
like we're kids
like I'm sitting on your handle bars
as you steer
laughter so abundant
we don't even worry
of
falling off or crashing
you just keep driving me
hugging the curves and
keeping me going in a direction --
it
doesn't matter where
but so long as were together
racing with matches and fire
you entice me
so hot it hurts
like a friction burn to stop
as we whirl round and round
a ball of fire
brightly colored
freshly exciting
we
are together
catalyzing one another
our souls do not burn with this passion and spice
they make fission
and baby,
I like it,
no, love it.
Pleasure and Pain
Build a prison for your dreams
And
lock me up inside
Torture me with fantasy
Let everything be true
Come into
my dreams
Let me show you where I've been
It's you and me I've seen
Let me show you what I mean
In our secret
lustful shadow land
Let my powerful hand provide
And whips of dark passion
Pleasure and pain
Ride you, your subconscious
There
is nothing to hide
All is in fun, all for the rush
As we touch, with clothes undone
Caress you, control you
A
slave to my desire
But slowly you become more
With the same burning fire
Tying your master up now
And this dreamworld
playtime's just begun
Red Liquid Mineral
Things are not
as I'd like them to be.
I'm learning night
by night what blood tastes like to me.
You see my senses
dulled your see me wandering.
You see all I have
become but assure yourself its not a big thing.
Resting assured
in my will to live,
You see past the
call to give,
to me what I need
most,
An embrace, a passion
a guide,
a love, someone
on my side.
But these things
cannot be given,
Only the forceful
keep livin,
That is why I have
been beat,
And still I remain
in defeat,
A soul filled with
apathy,
Yet longing for
reprieve.
The sweet copper
swirl,
The red liquid
mineral.
These things keep
me company,
In my useless search
through infinity.
Fair-weather Apologies
I will always love
you just so you know,
But theres another
side, you see, so please dont let me go,
When I get mad,
Or things get bad,
I always say that
say the stuff that hurts,
Ill be your pal,
When things arent
foul,
But when times
get tough and things look rough,
I say the harshest
things,
But after-words
I know it stings,
And the past cannot
be altered,
No matter how bad
I faltered,
All I can manage
it to place some gauze,
Over the wounds
I cause.
Im sorry.
To err is human,
to forgive divine. -unknown
Stupid
System
Stupid teachers.
Stupid me. Can't
get up, can't go to bed, can't focus, can't use my head.
Stupid parents.
Enrage my spirit most every night. With all your egos and all our fights.
Quiet anger. Rhymes well
up, like tears unshed and still in the cup.
A breath of life.
To escape the impurities. Smothered everyday. By so much disease.
I hate this system,
can't we destroy it? I know you agree, won't you hear a bit?
Damned robotic
lives, fighting for to survive. A mouse in a maze, a rat in a cage.
The training facility
suppresses, preparing you to be one of the masses.
So angry I write,
so helpless, can't fight.
Isn't there another
way? To make a better today?
I'm a failure in
your eyes, Join the system, you advise.
Damned if I do,
Damned if I don't and most of all, damned if I won't.
Well fuck it all,
I'm gonna resist till I fall.
Sitting in their
desk, standing in their lines, following their rules, believing all their lies.
You innocent thing,
But I am not. You've been taught not to sing, but I forgot.
You say I'd see
it your way if I only tried, the trouble with that is: if I do it'd be myself to whom I lied.
Scrambling and
clawing, that's the way it's done, when truth is what you seek and justice must be won.
Untitled
Your
actions fit your moments purpose
Your
words creating an angry void
You
rip me a new scar
Then
turn away like nothings new
You
know Im sensitive
You
know I trust you
Laughing
at my anger
Belittling
my complaint
You
son of a bitch
You
make me hate
You
take your position
Change
it when it suits you best
Turn
me aside
Lock
your door
When
I come round to settle the score
We
know Im not all right up there
But
little did I know how you could not care
How
I loathe you
When
this is what you do
Pick
your fight
Be
the vicious type
Bend
my will
Make
me see
Then
when Ive had enough
I come
back at you
Twice
as tough
You
scorn me like a child
And
turn me away
So
mild
You
son of a bitch
You
make me hate
You
take your position
Change
it when it suits you best
Turn
me aside
Lock
your door
When
I come round to settle the score
We
know Im not all right up there
But
little did I know how you could not care
Dreams
Dreams
are idling
The
mind at play
Mystical
worlds inviting
Though
you cannot stay
Exciting
your senses
Wondrous
themes
Remember
what is real
And
what only seems
A
dungeon of horrors
A
battle of hate
A
killer in cold blood
A
sprig of violence from the inanimate
Splendid
frolics
To
feel loved and free
A
place without boundaries
Slumber
cradling intimacy
A
haunting realization
A
premonition grasped from an abyss
Threatening,
questioning
Foretelling
a hit or only near miss?
Oh
bedtime poltergeist!
How
you enlight!
What
wonders you bring!
How
some spite!
But
without you
Woe,
woe, woe to-night
Down
I lie, give me a show
Goodnight.
I, Me, Them, Us, We & Myself
I used to love me.
When me plus them equaled we,
But now that's
gone.
It's me.
And there's them.
We has been subtracted,
Us; divided.
I don't love me.
How can I?
When
me made us divide,
When me makes them hate myself.
Why Why Why
Have I become so wrong?
So unfit for we.
I has
become alone and disliked
For all that I is.
I used to love me.
But now I can't.
Love me.
Even though me made
us divide,
Even though me makes them hate myself.
Can you?
Can you love I?
--Moi
Discord
Here
we are again
This
familiar place
Unwilling
to bend
Flexibility
is for the weak
Silence
slivering between us
Our
minds clouded
With
feelings of righteousness
Delusions
of rationality
Sharing
nothing
But
feeling everything
Alike
in anger and hurt
And
likewise, apart
Celestial
worlds between us
In
peril, subtle conflict
Rushing
faster in heated words
Becoming
a silent palpable discord
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